Understanding the Mother Daughter Relationship
The Global Women’s Peace Network USA (GWPN), a project of Women’s Federation for World Peace, celebrated Mother’s Day weekend with a special featured event hosted by the Buhay Buhay sa Amerika show. Buhay Buhay sa Amerika is a Filipino Online Radio show that promotes inspiring Pinoy stories, addresses special topics, and upcoming events in the community. The theme and content of this episode was centered on “Understanding the Mother-Daughter Relationship.” The forum featured two expert panelists who shared their experiences and advice, followed by a Q and A session. The program took place on May 8, 2021, with over 580 attending the session live.
Rhia Luz, host of Buhay Buhay sa Amerika, moderated the program alongside her daughter Hanna Luz. Participants were warmly welcomed with an early Mother’s Day greeting. Glenda Lambert, GWPN Coordinator, co-hosted this episode and shared an introductory video about the work of WFWP. They promoted the upcoming Peace and Blessing Festival on June 5, where Dr. Hak Ja Han Moon, co-founder of WFWP will share a wonderful message and the event will promote family and marriage values.
Panelist Rosjke Hasseldine, Director and Founder of the Mother-Daughter Coaching International and Author, began the session by sharing how women can navigate the relationship between mothers and daughters. She discussed the importance of understanding the upbringing of our mothers and grandmothers, and paying close attention to whether or not they could voice their desires and needs in the family. Mother-daughter work is about giving a voice to the female perspective.
Rosjke emphasized that the mother-daughter relationship “is a mirror reflection of what it means to be female in a family, society, culture, and how religion treats women. The sociocultural atmosphere will directly impact the relationship as well as generational relationships.” The beautiful relationship between mothers and daughters can be “a vehicle for generational change in creating the family and world that women desire and that men need.” Through understanding unmet needs and desires, we can support each other and in turn create a better society.
Hilary Truong, MA, LPC at Live and Bloom, and Teaching Faculty at Mother-Daughter Coaching International, continued the conversation with her expertise in mother and teen daughter relationships. She addressed how there is a generational divide with mothers raising their daughters through their own experiences as a teen. It is key for mothers and daughters to look at each other with softer eyes to understand where they are coming from and allow empathy for their needs. Also, it is critical to have alone time with each other. For example, knocking on their door at night to spend time together building communication and trust.
Hilary shared how mothers need to model using their voice to address their needs, and showing their daughters that it is important to do things as a team in a family. Also, listening is a powerful tool in allowing a teen girl to open up. We show a lot with “our body language and tone of voice with how empathetic we are. It’s hard to have empathy and patience and not just fix [the problem. However,] they do need to learn how to solve problems on their own. It helps her to build trust and empowers her to listen to her own voice.”
Following the panel session, Hanna shared her reflection that “as daughters we don’t realize [our mothers] were people before they were mothers. [Realizing] there was a time [my mother] had her own hopes and dreams, helped me grow empathy for my own mother and grandmother. [...] There’s so much I can learn from them.”
Participants expressed their gratitude for this special episode of understanding the mother-daughter relationship and how it can determine the future.