TEN TIPS FOR HELPING YOUR FRIEND WITH CANCER
Editor’s note: Showing people you care is especially important in the tough times, but it’s not always easy to know where to start. How do you comfort a loved one struggling with something as life-altering as cancer? This was the question that led WFWP southwest regional chairwoman Shirley Chimes to connect to the nonprofit CanCare.
Recently, while waiting in my doctor’s office, I picked up a flyer about cancer by an organization called CanCare that I want to share with our readers. Not knowing how to talk to a friend who has recently been diagnosed with breast cancer, I read it eagerly. CanCare has more than 600 trained volunteers and the organization kindly agreed to let us re-publish their flyer in our newsletter. May it give you hope and encouragement. Please pass it on.
CanCare
Ten Tips for Helping Your Friend with Cancer
The mission of CanCare is to improve the quality of life for cancer patients and their families.
Be Positive: Today there is so much hope in dealing with cancer. Your friend with cancer needs a handshake or a hug of confidence. A cancer diagnosis is a crisis, but do not assume your friend will die of cancer. After treatment, many cancer survivors live out their normal lifetime cancer-free.
Listen! Your friend with cancer needs to talk about what has happened and express honest feelings. Stay in touch. A second visit shows that you really care.
Tears Are O.K: Your friend may also need to cry with you.
Remember, Cancer Affects the Whole Family: Kindness shown to family members helps the person with cancer. You could offer to come and stay with your friend to give the family a break or take children out for some diversion.
Love and Support Are Needed: People dealing with cancer don’t need pity. Pity doesn’t help morale. Encouragement gives confidence to face the realities of cancer. Your friend may be lonely or afraid. Send cards or a book or a video for a laugh. Bring a favorite dish. Show love by celebrating life.
Pray For Your Friend With Cancer: Channels for healing are opened by your prayers. God’s desire is for healthy, whole, happy people. God’s presence brings peace, strength and hope.
Offer Specific Help: Do not say, “Call me any time,” if you don’t mean it. Say what you are willing to do. “I can drive you anywhere or do any errand for you on Tuesdays,” or “I’ll bring supper the next two Monday nights. Are there any foods I should avoid?”
Use The Word “Cancer”: It is only a word for the disease, not a sentence. It makes your friend feel bad if you avoid the word and refer to cancer as “your problem.” Avoid making decisions for your friend. Help them be a part of any decision making. Include them in as many “usual” events as possible.
Make Phone Calls and Visits Short and Upbeat: Your friend with cancer needs success stories, diversion, friendship and hope. Staying away sends a bad message. Short visits show love and consideration, but call before you visit.
Get Permission from Your Friend to Call CANCARE: CanCare’s phone number is: 713-461-0028 or toll free 888-461-0028. Every person with cancer deserves to have a friend who has been there. CanCare volunteers are trained to know how to help. For more information visit their website https://cancare.org/.
HOW CANCARE HELPS:
Matches you with a survivor of the same or similar type of cancer that you have.
Allows you to talk freely and openly about experiences, side effects and concerns.
Is available to patients with any type and stage of cancer.
Matches your loved ones to our experienced caregivers.
Helps you find hope after a diagnosis of cancer.
Is free and confidential.
Together we are fighting cancer with hope!